I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Looking at the victoria's secret website makes the ice cream I'm eating taste like sadness and obesity
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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