Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
Randomize
