youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
dude this night sums up my single life. naked, crying, and covered in honey. i need to get laid.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
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