At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
Randomize
