Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
Randomize
