she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I need to stop getting picked up at 3 am by my friends parents. This is the second time this week. I'm a grown man.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
