Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
Randomize
