that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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