Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
there is puke in my bra ... again
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
Randomize
