Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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