dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I woke up smelling like chlorine with a broke toe. They know how to fucking party on lake lanier.
I feel like I got ass raped in the brain.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
He's short and fat and honestly I think he's what my self esteem was made for
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
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