Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
drunk lawn darts. Let's test the homeowners policy
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Randomize
