I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I now have a other guy willing to drive 3 hours for my vagina. At my next gyno appointment I'm asking her if there's cocaine in there.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
