its not stalking. its research.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Okay I can't even be mad, I'm in mid-plot to hook up with Michael Phelp's third cousin.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Randomize
