She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
Randomize
