Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I'd rather just be alone, than deal with this bullshit. I just want to be alone. Cats and vibrators never let you down.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
