Buhtt sex?
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
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