And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
He better not be in your backpack
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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