He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Nothing says Christmas like gin and tears.
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
im destined to be single forever. i hope its okay if your kids come and hang out with my cats.
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
These tits shall not be calmed
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
