I must be too annoying 4 u.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
He said he was from Mississippi and my vagina clamped shut like a frightened oyster
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Randomize
