I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
That awkward moment when the guy you hooked up on spring break invites you over for dinner to meet his parents and you say yes because the first rule of college is never turn down a free meal.
THE SHIT YOU GET YOURSELF INTO
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
