Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
He is really real. Like I know where he works, have referenced him with mutual fb friends and I've seen his dick. He's real.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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