how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
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