Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I almost put an adult beverage in my sippy cup for the beach but realized the next step would be rehab.
No the next step is being buzzed at the beach. I would've.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
i can feel my liver failing just LOOKING at that thing
Randomize
