covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
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