I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Hippo gnu deer
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
