My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
I intend to get homeless drunk
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
