So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Randomize
