as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I'm at an open mic night and the next act is called 'the best creed cover band ever.' The guy i recently hooked up with is on bass.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Randomize
