dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
It's one thing to send dick shots. It's a whole other thing to send unimpressive dick shots while wearing crocs.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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