fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I just group texted a dick pic. Wonder who'll respond back first. Ashley Stacey or my stepmom
Randomize