She said her name was "party"
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
He started crying and showing me pictures of his ex. she was really pretty. It's an honor to have shared a penis with her.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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