is your mom at the bar?
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
