Where are you?
In a non slutty way
I'm hiding behind a bush in mens clothing next to a ducks crossing sign. There are joggers. Please hurry.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Just come home. We will have sex and Taco Bell. I'm feeling wild, I put on temporary tattoos.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
last night I used snow as a chaser
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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