I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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