ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
