508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
Randomize