I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I woke up in a front yard I didn't recognize to a grandma tapping me with her foot. What was in that punch?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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