Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
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