It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
We let 3 boys take us home and then we woke up in the middle of the night, stole all the coozies out of the house, a loaf of bread, a case of water, a pair of shorts, called a cab, and went home.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
I shaved an Xmas tree into my junk.... I placed your present underneath.
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize