brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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