He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
Memo to self- delete texts about butt sex from you before giving my mom my old phone to use.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
oh god was she eating orange peels again
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
