real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Randomize
