I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
I have no words
Neither did my mom, when she walked in on me squating with my balls in a cup of hot water.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Of course I have a pirate flag
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I'M OFFICIATING THIS WEDDING. HOLY SHIT.
Randomize
