maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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