We've made a drinking game out of how many times the tornado sirens go off. We're good at tornado safety.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I didn't notice because vodka
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
Randomize
