Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I just had to ask my dad for money to pay for my birth control. I've hit financial rock bottom.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize