ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
