I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
