how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
