what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
Randomize
