ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
I woke up to a bunch of college seniors jacking off a horse in my face. Geuss who didnt move in time?
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Randomize
