I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
We are like the golden girls with less cheesecake and more drugs.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Randomize
